The Wit and Wisdom of David Johnson: Embrace Your Fear and Anxiety

Kerry stares numbly at the notice on the bulletin board announcing the permanent closing of his plant. It’s the only job he’s had for twenty-five years.

What am I going to do?

Wiping her sweating palms on her jeans, Diane feels like she’s having a heart attack. Her final exam this semester involves making a class presentation. 

I can’t do this! I’m going to freak out!

Tobias looks at the clock behind the desk where he’s checking in for surgery. In a matter of hours he’s supposed to be operated on for cancer. 

What if I don’t make it through the surgery?  What if they can’t get all the cancer? What if it’s worse than what they expect?

Tara lies awake. It’s 3:00 a.m. She has an interview today for a new job. 

What will I do if I don’t get this job? It’s my third try in the last four months. My unemployment is running out.

Does some of this sound familiar?

I don’t know anyone who hasn’t been afraid or felt anxious, including myself.

Fear and anxiety can paralyze us. Worse than that, either of them can make us retreat, crawl into a hole, and give up.

For years I worked with people to help them not feel afraid or anxious. Let me tell you: that’s hard work, from either the client’s chair or the therapist’s chair!

In recent years I’ve had a shift in my attitude toward these twin killers, and because of the shift, my focus with clients has changed as well.

The trigger for these changes was my becoming more aware of my own internal dialogue during moments of fear and anxiety. Here’s how my self-talk used to sound:

“This is too much for me.”

“I can’t face this.”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do!”

“What if I don’t (make it, survive it, endure it, overcome it)?”

“I can’t move forward.”

“I don’t know what I’ll do if……”

What I noticed about this one-way dialogue was the repeated use of the personal pronouns: “I” and “me.”

Suddenly, a number of realizations come tumbling in. (Isn’t it interesting how once we open our mind to viewing things differently, new insights can come flooding in?)

Realization number one: I was making each situation all about me, as if I was all alone in facing them.

Realization number two came fast on the heels of number one: All the statements I was making to myself were true. I didn’t know what I was going to do. I couldn’t face it. I didn’t know what I’d do if….

All the statements were true because of realization number three: I had carved God completely out of the equation. He was nowhere in my conceptualization of my situation.

Realization number four said to me: “I have to put God in front me in all these situations. If I will let God lead, I can follow Him anywhere and survive anything.”

That last realization was the one that allowed me to breathe easier, to relax, and to smile.

However, I was left with trying to understand where fear and anxiety come from.

Neuroscientists, who believe man has evolved over millions of years from a brute caveman, answer that these emotions come from our primitive brain, the one that kept us from being eaten by dinosaurs.

But because I don’t share those scientists’ basic premise, I had to consider other possible explanations.

I know Satan’s desire is to make man miserable and, in that misery, to destroy him. Satan knows that when man is miserable, he will resort to most anything, especially ungodly things, to escape.

That’s when it occurred to me that fear and anxiety are tools of Satan. He’s the one who whispers in our ear, “You can’t…” and “What if…” and “You’ll never…”

Once I realized this, I almost laughed out loud because the answer was so simple.

Now when I feel anxiety or fear in my heart, I turn Satan’s tools on their head. I put my arms around them and embrace them.

I speak to them and say, “Thank you for coming by and reminding me that I need to be sure I have God in front of me. I really appreciate you dropping by.”

So, the next time you feel anxious or fearful, don’t run or cower. Pull your anxiety and fear closer to you. Be happy they stopped by.

Feel your feelings. Listen closely and discover what you can learn from them.